We’re sick of the Switch. Too smooth. Too soft.

We want pixels, not polish.

If you didn’t blow on a cartridge like it was CPR, this ain’t for you.

$GAMEBOY is for the grayscale degenerates.

The ones who played in the dark until the batteries died — and then stole some from the remote.

Tokenomics? Nah, cartridgenomics.

No presale. No VC. Just raw nostalgic liquidity.

Rugproof because it’s already emotionally rugged.

Every time you mint, a Game Boy gets its batteries back.